Experiences and your fear of engagement
Want to go visit a nudist colony?
I don't know, what's it like?
You know, a lot of people not wearing clothes.
Show me some pictures, then I'll know.
Well, actually, you won't.
You won't know what it's like merely by looking at a picture of a bunch of naked people.
The only way you'll know what it's like is if you get seen by a bunch of naked people. The only way to have the experience is to have the experience.
Not by looking at the experience.
By having it.
But having an experience for the first time is frightening. So we try to avoid the fear by simulating it, putting the experience into a box that makes it like something else we've done, something that's safe.
Of course, if you put a new experience in the box of an old experience, it's not a new experience, is it? Problem solved.
But you've also just cut yourself off from what that new experience could deliver. A new box. The entire point.