Just looking

Lots of people go to the beach but very few get in the water.

3,000 students go to the football game to watch 20 of their peers play.

And we go to a conference to meet people and connect, and then spend most of our time hoping someone else will see us and care enough to meet us and connect.

A friend just got to college and is a bit concerned that there’s not a lot to do at night. This opens the door to the question, “why not organize the other people who don’t have anything to do at night and give them something to do?”

There are millions of years of evolution that encourage us to avoid strangers and new experiences. And decades of school and indoctrination that train us to stay in our lane, wait for instructions and keep our head down.

And yet plenty of people go to the conference…

The next time, walk up to the first unattached person you see and ask a few generous questions, the kind of questions you wish someone would ask you.

When you join an online community, lurking is unlikely to get you what you seek. Find a non-lurker and contribute to their thread. Generosity is not the same as hustle.

Instead of waiting to make the varsity team, start an intramural league, even if it’s for just an afternoon.

If you’re just looking, stay home. Plenty to see from your couch.

For people seeking to make a difference, it begins with helping other people make a difference.