“It’s your fault”
Those are harsh words. They imply agency, responsibility and failure.
The response might be, “I did everything I was supposed to do.” Or perhaps, “What should I have done? I followed all the instructions.”
Agency and freedom go together. We have more choices than we want to admit. When Ahab decided to become a whaling captain, everything that happened after that was related to his initial choice.
What do we make? The answer is simple: choices.
Owning our choices is a celebration of our future agency. You don’t get yesterday over again, but you do get to make new choices tomorrow.