The language we use, the standards we adhere to, the kind of interactions that are permitted–this is up to the host.
You’re at a dinner party, and if you want to be welcomed back, you’ll need to be aware of the way things are around here.
On the other hand, if you insist on rules that are out of sync with the sensibilities and standards of those you invite, don’t be surprised if they choose not to return.
It all begins by understanding who is acting as host. It might be you.